Sangam Diaspora

By Aditi Bhattacharjee

You Know You’re South Asian When…

1. Your relatives give you food after you say you’re full and could not possibly eat anymore
2. Your parents call overseas and scream at the top of their lungs, even though connections are 100 times better today than five years ago.
3. You call your other brown friends’ parents, Uncle and Auntie.
4. People assume (correctly, most of the time) that you are going to become a doctor or an engineer.
5. Your parents get mad at you when your skin becomes darker
6. Your parents enjoy comparing you to their friends’ kids
7. Everyone thinks you’re “Indian” no matter what part of South Asia your ancestors are from.
8. Your parents say, “Calculus? I took calculus in 8th grade!”
9. Your parents buy your clothes and shoes a few sizes too big so you can “grow into it.”
10. You are capable of eating an entire meal, including rice, using only your right hand.
11. You’ve had to sit through movies with severely underdressed women and gleeful men dancing and lip singing in exotic locations.
12. You are sick and tired of answering questions about “the dot” or “worshipping cows.”
13. You’ve been asked if you speak “Indian.”
14. You have a countless number of nicknames, some of which include “Chotu” or “Babu”
15. When you tell your parents you got 98% on your test, and they ask you what happened to the other 2%
16. If there is a sale on any item, you buy 100 of them.
17. You’ve learned to keep bargaining even if the prices are rock bottom.
18. Your relatives alone could populate a small city.
19. You ask your dad a simple question and he tells you story of how he had to walk miles barefoot just to get to school.
20. Airport security pays extra attention to you.

– Aditi Bhattacharjee